Grace, I copied the Google definition below.
Here’s the google definition:
simple elegance or refinement of movement.
“she moved through the water with effortless grace”
elegance, poise, gracefulness, finesse; More
suppleness, agility, nimbleness, light-footedness
Ok, what’s the point? Well, um, I had to exercise some grace today. I had my work performance review. I got some feedback. Some balanced feedback to be fair. Some good, and some very challenging to accept. But it was not new, my boss is decent and he believes in no surprises when it comes to performance reviews, so I was prepared.
The reflection I had been doing on my own interactions in the world and at work, and my meditations, and recent developments all put me a good place to accept what was discussed, and I hope I did this with grace. When you get some critical feedback, going to defensive mode or lashing out isn’t really the preferred option…..
So I also had a chat with J. She has been many things to me in the past three years (mother, lover, friend, partner in crime). I love her. Things have to change, its all tied together in a work/life/family/situation matrix. I don’t think I can be what she wants me to be at this time and it would be unfair to allow her to believe that my head and heart are in the same place that they once were.
When we are faced with a need for change, and our hearts and minds are not ready to let go, the situation can become tense and even hostile. During our chat tonight, I probably got a little defensive and frustrated. I was busy protecting my ego. She may have expressed some anger and frustration too.
But what we resolved is that we want to remain friends, who support each other. We still have a value to bring to each other, and I think that’s the essence of a good relationship. The distance, the baggage, the complications, the schedules, the emotional upsets, its all too much for the current environment (or headspace?) I’m in, or creating, to be the right fit for us both now, but fuck! we had some fun! Like, really!
Here’s where I give her credit. She handled it with grace. She referenced god as a being for her, that is both challenging her and supporting her – she is leaning on her spirituality and I think that is a beautiful thing. She’s a kind heart, a wonderful soul, a dedicated mother, and I love her for all that she is.
But my life is changing, and I don’t want to disappoint her, or anyone else really, so I need to give myself and her, some time and space.
J, if you are reading this, you’re a game changer, hon. Thank you, for everything….
Blossom, conjures images of spring, flowers, that wonderful feint aroma of delicate fragrances that emanate from the garden. Not like the overpowering assault on the nasal passage that you get when you pass by the perfume counters at department stores, something much more organic, and subtle.
My garden is blossoming. Its wonderful to see the flowers, with their colours and textures, as they bob in the breeze, their stems resisting the tension placed on them by the breeze, oscillating, back and forth, a natural spring and damper system at work, somewhat like a young engineer might study in class, yet immensely more beautiful and powerful than a clinical diagram of a spring and a piston, accompanied by a differential equation in mechanical mathematics.
The insects fly around, intoxicated by the heady aromas, they are in a frenzy of pollen collecting and incidental fertilization of the plants. They are driven, by perhaps millions of years of evolution, instinctively drawn to the sweetness in the flowers. For them, its a about survival. The birds, they too are drawn to these wonders of nature. The bugs provide a tempting game, and the garden provides the ideal environment for their quarry.
A blossom is like a woman’s sex. Layers and folds of wonderful promise. Changing in texture, and shape, and fullness. As the birds and insects are drawn, so is a man to this wonderful creation. The subtle sensations, the taste, the smell, its all just part of natures plan. It’s an intoxicating blend of pheromones and pleasant smells, and the taste, it can be so subtle, delicate, organic, orgasmic!
A person can blossom too, as they grow, their personalities are revealed. Sometimes challenged, sometimes humble, sometimes the aggressor, always evolving with experience. All wonderfully unique.
Sometimes, when we photograph, things just come together right. A rain shower had provided the soil with the moisture that these beautiful plants needed to be full and luscious.
The spring has advanced enough to let these flowers experience their hey day.
The sun was positioned just right shining through yet partially filtered by the trees on the avenue.
I just happened to be there, with camera in hand. Studying the macro-economics at work in this lovely little flower garden on a side street in front of a café.