Forgiveness – Letting go of blame. A contribution to forgivingjournal….

Hi bloggers, through the magic of WordPress, you get to interact with other wonderful people out there. I stumbled across a really nice blog site called forgivingjournal, and was invited (or is that I insisted?) on writing a piece in contribution. In any case, here is the link to Debbie’s blogsite: forgivingjournal.

Ok, so, forgiveness, forgiving. That’s pretty much the theme of this wonderful blog site. It’s potentially a loaded gun, forgiveness, to blog about I mean. It’s because how do you like, explain how you are forgiving someone for something, without implicating them of some sort of wrong doing? I’m not judging in any way, we are all on our own journey, and I feel that there are things that I am ok with blogging about, and things that I feel I need to protect others’ privacy on.

For instance, I can’t say, I forgive my wife for being angry at me for doing something I did, and she feels entirely justified in her anger, because I did something to or against her. She’ll read this, and I’ll be in the shit, so I’m not going to do this.

Similar for my family, or others close to me. I don’t want to air my dirty laundry (any more than I already do on WP), its just too loaded. It’s too raw, too emotional.

Here’s what I can say:

I forgive myself, for being human, for doing stupid regrettable things, for embarrassing myself (actually still doing things that yield this result, I call that life). Forgiving oneself, and accepting ourselves as we are is extremely powerful and liberating.

I forgive others, who at times I have been angry and resentful towards. Often times, I have realised that this anger and resentment is really just a reflection or projection of my own insecurities and things that I have not resolved within myself. There are some good Buddhist type quotes along the lines of if you hold on to your anger, you will be the one that suffers. It affects you more than anyone else. Holding on to anger is like holding a hot coal, it is you who gets burned.

Meditation helps. If I am carrying some negative energy about a situation or a person, often if I meditate on that, I can allow those feelings of anger or resentment to resolve, to be put into perspective.

That, to me, is forgiveness.

Advertisements

3 thoughts on “Forgiveness – Letting go of blame. A contribution to forgivingjournal….

  1. This is beautiful! I’ve got it and will share tomorrow for Forgiving Fridays. 🙂 Thanks so much.

    One key that I use for forgiveness is to forgive myself for placing a judgment to begin with. So it’s not, for me, about forgiving someone else for anything, it’s forgiving myself for judging that they – or their behavior – is right or wrong. Rumi has a great quote, something like “Out beyond ideas of wrong-doing or right-doing, there is a field. I’ll meet you there.” So it’s the judging that we can let go of, rather than forgiving someone for doing something “wrong” or “bad”. It can be quite a freeing approach.

    Anyway, thanks again. I love your post and the honesty and openness with which you share. So happy to know you on WordPress!! Blessings, Debbie

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s